Thursday, October 7, 2010
More Zen Brush Painting
Once a Juggler
Once I was a juggler,
a very good one actually.
I juggled balls big and small
all day long, never dropping one.
I wanted to stop but the balls
just kept flying, my hands
and eyes too busy catching
and tossing to see the right
moment in each trajectory
to capture and hold. I asked
for help. I explained that
it just wasn’t fun anymore.
Who was I kidding, it
was never fun. It was survival.
And, while I no longer consider
myself a juggler, I still have balls in the
air. Balls that long ago, I threw so
high they don’t come down
for months, sometimes years.
But they do come down
and my heart stops with
their insistence and urgency.
I want to stop. It isn’t fun anymore.
On the other hand, alone can be very enjoyable.
Very soothing. Sometimes just fun and silly. Something about using this app is stretching my drawing. Somehow I feel more confident. I think it gets me past the terror of thinking of "ruining" a piece of paper.
When I look over this poem and the art, it strikes me as kind of depressed. I'm really feeling pretty good. Got a new prescription that just might work!
Lets all just feel how we feel and enjoy it, whatever it is.